Sunday, July 15, 2012

Real Salvation

When there's a problem with our circuitry we have to evaluate our performance where others simply move on through without even recognizing that they've changed the world in some respect.  I rose early.  That's good.  But I went back to bed.  That's not good.  I said "that's not good" instead of saying "that's bad."  That's good.  That kind of thing.  A problem in our circuitry compels us to lose the weight we'd otherwise carry around with us.  It causes us to become more positive in general terms.  A sudden wave at the neighbor where a scowl would otherwise have been delivered.  A new vernacular develops with our spouse.  Instead of berating everyone else for being so fucking backward, I simply inquire:  "How'd I do today?"  And I listen hard for her response.  I'll either be rewarded and made cognizant of my progress, or be painfully made aware of the fact that I've strayed from my path of real salvation.  "Real Salvation" is daunting.  It requires me to act where no action is brewing, or to refrain from acting when all my internal matter is aligned and prepared to jut out through my arms, legs, and especially my venomous mouth.  "Real Salvation" means that if my medication makes me itch I must not mindlessly scratch the itch.  These go away.  But what is most important is that I must not portend the itches that lie ahead of me.  I must stay in this moment.  Nor may I stray off into the past, playing blame the game, or blaming the Random Number Generator, or blaming God.  Or blaming the absence of God.  Concentrate on the immediate, and I will be well.  I trust that these things at least border on Real Salvation.  I trust that they are true because I must embrace the truth in order to stay buoyant in these troubled times.